lookingup

Dustin LindenSmith

father | musician | writer


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lookingup

15 things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/friend is taking his/her sweet time:

These aren't always funny, but this one cracked me up.

1) Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren't looking.

2) Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.

3) Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor to the rest rooms. (YIKES!)

4) Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3 in housewares', ... and see what happens.

5) Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6) Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7) Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.

8) When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9) Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

10) While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

11) Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible'.

12) In the auto department practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.

13) Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through say "PICK ME!! PICK ME!!!!"

14) When an announcement comes over the loud speaker assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again".

15) Go into a fitting room and yell real loudly... "Hey! We're out of toilet paper in here! "

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fireceremony January 27th, 2003

>11) Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from 'Mission Impossible'.

LOL ! :D

chaizzilla January 28th, 2003
heheh... Code Three... wunner what it is?

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