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Dustin LindenSmith

father | musician | writer

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A woman from Newfoundland "of a certain age" visited her physician to enlist his help in reviving her husband's sex drive. The doctor asked if they'd tried Viagra. "Not a chance," she said. "He won't even take an aspirin, dear."

"No problem," replied the doctor. "Drop it into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went."

It wasn't a week later that she rang up the doctor to report on her progress.

"Faith, bejaysus and begorrah!" she exclaimed. "'Twas horrid, I tell ya -- just terrible, Doctor. I did as you told me and I slipped it in his coffee, didn't I? Well the effect was almost immediate.  He jumped hisself straight up with a twinkle in his eye and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and dishes flying, ripped me clothes to total tatters and took me then and there, making wild, mad, passionate love to me on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell ya!"

"Why is that?" asked the doctor. "Do you mean the sex was not good?" 

"No, no, no, Doctor, the sex was fine. Indeed, 'twas the best sex I've 'ad in 25 years. The problem, Doctor, is that I'll never be able to show me face at Tim Horton's again!"

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chaizzilla June 27th, 2005
who is tim horton?

iamom July 4th, 2005
You probably already know that Tim Hortons is a huge chain of coffee shops in Canada. Time Horton the person was a Canadian hockey star who started the operation in Hamilton, ON in 1964.

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