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Dustin LindenSmith

father | musician | writer

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Canadian blonde joke

A blonde woman in Vancouver was so depressed that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. She went down to the docks and was about to leap into the frigid water when a handsome young sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the pier, crying. He took pity on her and said, "Look, you have so much to live for. I'm off to Hawaii in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm round her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy and you'll keep me happy." The blonde nodded. After all, what did she have to lose? Perhaps a fresh start in Hawaii would give her life new meaning.

That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and then they made passionate love until dawn. Two weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the Captain.

"What are you doing here?" the Captain asked.

"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explained. "I get food and a trip to Hawaii, and in return he's screwing me."

"He certainly is," the Captain said. "You're on the ferry to Nanaimo."

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chaizzilla June 27th, 2005
heheh have you had one of those nanaimo bars? they're killer sweet.

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