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Dustin LindenSmith

father | musician | writer


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lookingup

time travel

Thu 2 Mar

I underwent an interesting process with M on Tueday morning. She guided me in some sort of a regression exercise during which I related my memories, all the way back to before the time I was born. She didn't seem surprised that I recalled feelings from pre-birth, but I wasn't exactly expecting it...

The exercise, while leaving me a bit bewildered, also left me at some real peace. I became aware of a sense of true "I-ness," or a sense that "I was" before I was born, and that "I will be" after I die. I realized that the outer Dustin that everyone else around me knows is not the deepest, truest Dustin. In many respects, those two beings are quite similar, but the deeper "me" was a very strong, grounded force of energy. I realized that at the root of my heart and being, there existed a pervasive and all-consuming BEING, just by itself. This intransient force of Will is the basis for my body, my mind, and personality, but also forms the fundamental subatomic particles of the universe itself. This is literally true for me right now. It represents itself to me intellectually as the primary, fundamental Consciousness (and inner Tao of all things), and represents itself spiritually to me as pure, white, all-permeating, grounded, Peace. This force moves me like metal filings pulled by a magnet. I stick to each of its molecules, one at a time, joined inseparably at the nucleus. I am one frequency of a total harmony, reverberating richly against all the other frequencies and overtones.